What do I want for me? (by Brendan Horsfall)

The last few weeks have been an amazing experience of letting go. Allowing myself to let go of expectation, obligation and others hopes for me. Im such a people person and that often leads to me being enlisted in other peoples dreams through their passion and enthusiasm, but it leads me down the wrong path.

I have spent a lot of my life feeling obligated to be a certain person. Or feeling expectation from influential people in my life. My perception of their expectation that I create, even if it doesn’t exist. And I know what your thinking… Why the hell would you do that?

We as people are shaped by the experiences in our lives. Be it good or bad. And we learn in these experiences by the emotion that we feel. And that emotion can create a behaviour that we use to choose to feel or avoid that emotion throughout our lives. And this happens mostly without our concious knowledge.

As a young boy I experienced the feeling of obligation and expectation and created a behaviour in my life that has stayed with me until recently. It took me months to understand how this shows up in my life and how it affects my choices for my life. I can now say that im making choices for myself with the freedom to do whatever I choose, without feelings of guilt, obligation or expectation. Its a freedom that ive never felt before.

I want to use this forum to talk about some of the huge choices that im making over the next few months! Pretty damn exciting. This is a massive journey for me and im so humble to be where I am.

To leave you with some wisdom that I collected from a book given to me to read by good friend Simon Lawry, at the most opportune time.

This is your life, your one & only life. You determine whats possible. Make choices, ask questions, take steps – today is the day.

Either you are living out someone elses dream for you, or you are setting your own course. Dont let people tell you who you are.

To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best day and night to make you just like everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight – but never stop fighting.

Anonymous.

Stay classy.

B.