Six months of not drinking – check
First weekend back and regretting it – check
Debt coming down – check
Fitness improving – check
New mind set – CHECK
I’m not sure about others who have done this, but for me… I’ve spent the past 6 months trying to answer the question of why I drink and what does it mean to me?
In short – I drink because it’s a quick and easy way to be care-free and it means that I get to be equal with others.
Time is an annoying thing. Time to do things and time to give things the respect and meticulous attention that they need. So I think I have to mentioned what I do for work before but I feel I need to justify my slackness with my posts. Not for your sake, but for mine :p
I’m currently a HR Advisor and Senior Project Officer working within the corporate HR office of Queensland Health. Now if your a Queenslander actually an Australian and you haven’t heard of the MASSIVE payroll issues we have been having, well I am really wondering where you have been hiding because I am uber jealous! At the moment my job consist mainly of dealing with the really really really pissed off employees who haven’t been paid properly due to the recent implementation of our new payroll system. Which they have full right to be pissed off about because it is totally F’d that it is happening. Makes my day interesing because at one hand my “compassionate I want to help and do everything in my power to help you out” kicks in and I am getting people paid quicker then others and making those pissed off people happy. But then on the other hand, my “these is annoying and I am over it” mood kicks in as my days are spent getting yelled at because by the time they come to me, they have gone to everyone possible (including K.Rudd) and they still haven’t gotten paid properly. Interesting indeed!
This is a question that has been playing on my mind for the last few weeks when ever I reflect on this. Reflect on the reasons why I have chosen to do this, and chosen to not drink.
When I started this I was excited, pumped up at what I knew was going to be a really interesting 6 month period. Discovering who I am by finally facing a lot of inner demons and making what I like to call ‘a pure happiness’ one that is being constructed by my own hands and not being influenced by the affects of alcohol, because a lot of my fondest memories have been when a drink is in hand.
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WHAT WAS I THINKING!?!?!?!
So this blog will be a rant of why I am such an idiot. And thats not suger coating anything, its just being honest.
Its been just over a week of my HSM. And even though I have gone longer than this before without drinking, its a weird feeling being out and knowing that I have made the direct choice to say NO to any form of alcoholic substance. Even just to taste something new. Which is one of the hardest parts about doing this. Saying NO to this, for me, is becoming alot more then just giving up alcohol. Its me saying NO to alot of the crap that comes along with it.
This blog has developed from what I am witnessing, from what I know, and what I want out of this experience.
The title of this blog has been taken from one of my closest mates shirts, and when your on the ‘other side’ of the fence and not surrounded by the drinking culture, it sounds stupid. Put yourself in that culture and its an awesome saying! Funny how when you apply a word such as ‘wasted’ that is so negatively driven to something that is ultimately negative like drinking, it turns into a positive and good statement. Feels like I am back in grade 10 maths :p
For me, drinking and alcohol has always been done for two simple reason -
To me. The first reason is pretty self explanatory and a pretty good one when your weighing up the reasons as to whether you should or shouldn’t drink. The second… well, that’s something that’s individualistic and comes down to how well people are able to handle the crap that goes on in their lives. I’ve always found myself to be one of those people who others have always been able to come and have a chat to about things and more so then often it happens when I’m out and one of my mates have drunken themselves stupid that it all comes spilling out before I even know what is going on. Which I love, don’t get me wrong. But until now, I never have really thought about it and that second reason as to why some people drink as much as they do…
And when I think back on it, I’ve done it myself. Now, those WASTED weekends were nothing more then just.. wasted, lost, meaningless. I can’t even think of a morning after one of ‘those’ nights where I have re-woken from passing out somewhere and somehow, felt awsome about my problems and gone on with life. In fact, most of my problems seemed to have gotten worse because I’ve either said something or done something that never should of been said when I was in that state.
I get why people do though. It’s easy, and it numbs the pain of things. Takes people away to a place that is simpler and all that matters are the people who are with you, which are usually the people who make you laugh the most and sometimes, after one of those nights you walk away with some awsome memories. But there is always that risk of things turning sour and getting smack across the face with the reality of life is always going to come back.
I suppose the point I’m trying to get across is that I never want to be that type of person any more. I want to be able to handle my problems how they need to be, head on, and without apprehension or fear.
Plain and simple. I am horrible with money. Give me an extra $2 and I’ll spend it before I even think of saving. Give me a credit card, and I would have already maxed it out before thinking of how I would of been able to pay it off.
Currently, I have 2 MASSIVE debts. A personal loan for a jet ski (which I now no longer own) for about $5000 and a credit card (for a home gym) for about $2500. Now for some people, that’s not that much. But like I said, me seeing ‘extra money’ being there I’ll go and spend it without a second though. My loan has fluctuated up and down more times I have played with a yo yo. And the only reason why this credit card is going down at the moment and not back up, is because I ripped it up. But to be able to live my life the way I want to, I’ve ‘had’ to increase the limit on my second card which is ALOT more manageable forcing myself to pay it off before I even see my pay check.
At the moment I am earning some real good coin and working in an awsome position. But after the bills I have, I am left with no more then $250 to spend a week. Which has to include, food and petrol. So when it comes to play time. I really have nothing, and I don’t like doing things half ass. And to add onto that, how the heck am I meant to save? Go into a hole for a while and twiddle my thumbs? Not likely.
So that’s the sitch, updates will be coming more often as to how my debt is going! And if anyone has some financial advice, I would LOVE to hear from you. I’ve got to many burning ideas for my future. And none of them are going to happen if I continue going the way I am at the moment.
CB – out
Giving up alcohol has been something I have said I will do but I have never done it. Simply because ‘oh I have this birthday coming up, or this festival to go to’ immediately following that thought process always came the reliable ‘After that though, I swear, no alcohol for at least 6 months’. What denial I was in. So finally I have been given a solid grounding to do it, have something that will make myself accountable and give me a platform to express my views and have a support network that will get me through this.
My name is Carl Blunck, I’m 21 years old and I am ‘biting the bullet’ and giving alcohol up for 6 months. Finally!
Alcohol for me, as I have read for a lot of other HSMers, has been because at the back of head there always the thought of if I don’t drink I won’t have fun. I know that this is not true as I have proven on many occasions, (to my friends’ absolute gratitude) by being the deso and driving. Even though, when I did this, I would always have the mandatory start off drink, to ease some nervousness and get my dancing shoes on. I got brought into drinking when I was 16, going to one of my ‘older’ friends’ birthday parties and drinking myself stupid to fit in with that crowd. Fitting in always seemed to be the main reason behind many of the nights that I would get smashed and eventually wind up doing something I would no doubt regret in the morning. During this period my views on alcohol were simple, you do it to heighten the laughs, be more confident, and be able to take that step out of your comfort zone.
Now… I’m not so sure. And I am hoping this period of ‘freedom’ will give me some clarity and let all the thoughts that swim around in my head find some direction.
A little bit more about me – I have recently graduated from USC, walking away with a Bachelor of Business – Majoring in Human Resource Management and Minoring in Marketing as well as me some great memories and friends 
. Currently I work for Queensland Health as a HR advisor in Brisbane, which means during the week I live in Chermside and on the weekend I live on the Sunshine Coast so I can play football for CSPU and see my mum (who is the biggest legend in the world!) and some of the greatest people I know. I have a passion for all things creative, photos, food, music, fashion and anything that takes your breath away.
Oh and my YES is going to be get a strangle hold on the stupid debt that I have seemed to dug myself into. More on that later as it will take some time to figure out how much I am actually in… Scary thought!
The next 6 months are going to be interesting, I really hope you enjoy reading my blogs as much I will enjoy writing them .
Much love,
Carl
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