CHARLES WALL AKA BOBBY ALU Island Vibe Festival 2010 Interview Transcript: During the course of Island Vibe, we got to sit down and chat with a few of the performers including the lovely Charles Wall (AKA Bobby Alu) who spared his time between sets. Pretty sure we made him late to the second one. Sorry. We spoke briefly about the drinking culture of the music industry which I think warrants a deeper discussion. But that’s for next time. Full transcript below. When was the last time you drank to get drunk? The last time I drank to get drunk would have to be…last weekend. Have you ever had an extended period of sobriety? I have. How long? The longest sober period would be… a month? Why did you choose to do that? The previous 3 months had been very full-on (laughs) Why do you drink? The main reason would be to step up that ‘party vibe’…Yep. That would be the MAIN reason. Do you think you could do that without drinking? Yeah. Yeah I think I could do that. BUT. I think it would be hard. I think it would take a lot of practice. Why do you think it would be hard? Initially I’d be comparing. Getting drunk is always something you keep in your back pocket…it’s like your card that you’ll play if things aren’t going well. I’ve had so many good times being a little bit loosey-goosey that, yeah…it’s almost a dependence. So in that sense do you think you use alcohol as a social lubricant? I have used it. Yeah, definitely, I would say that. But I feel like I don’t rely on it, yet. But at the moment definitely, there’s been many a time where it has been a social lubricant. If you chose to do a HSM for 3 months, what issues do you think would arise? The initial issues I think would be FOMO. Fear Of Missing Out. I think the peer pressure thing would be the biggest. Y’know, watching all your friends that you’ve had so many good times with doing what they do. What are you scared of missing out on? I’m scared that without alcohol…it might be different. What’s a good time for Charles Wall? A good time? Yeah, so when you go out, why do you out? I go out to socialise, because I LOVE hanging out with my friends and I love meeting new people and chatting about stupid things. As a professional musician, obviously drinking is connected with the industry, do you feel more pressure as a musician to get drunk? Yes. Yes, definitely. The main reason would be, why there is a pressure would be, is… because it’s free. There would be many a time, especially on the last tour I was on, where I’d have a whole carton of beer to myself. And…what do you do with that? If you’ve got friends, Sure enough you’d give a heap away but yeah, just seems to wind down after a gig there’s always alcohol there and it’s a way to release. So on that note, are there particular times when you’re touring when you choose not to drink? Yeah, definitely. Those times are when I have three 7am calls in a row, so that day, and the day after and the day after. Or if I’m feeling ratshit from the night before because I was drinking. Do you limit yourself in your drinking habits to achieve your goals? Goals in music or personal ones? Yeah, I’m at a phase now where I’m definitely limiting my drinking to achieve my goals. For instance, doing more shows that are more personal to me that hold a lot of importance. I know that alcohol affects that. The shows are getting bigger these days, in my life, so it’s kind of being a bit more conscious of how loose I am. Or actually, you know, just being able to back up all the time because everything is getting so busy. What about when you were learning to play the drums, for example? Do you feel like you had normal drinking habits compared to everyone else, or did you limit your good times during that process? There was a degree of that for sure. If there’s one thing that alcohol does affect it’s your learning capability so if you’re in a different state you can’t actually learn on the fly. There were some points, so if I had a lot of information to digest I wouldn’t be drinking. Do you think alcohol is associated with your identity? If you stopped drinking would you feel a loss of self? A little bit. Yeah I think it’s got such a grasp on the industry, the music industry that is, a lot of people associate all musicians with drinking…people are surprised if you reject a drink…which is actually, you know, that’s kind of a big problem as well. Would you feel isolated if you didn’t drink? So for example, after a gig, you’ve got a 7am start but you’re keen to hang out. Would you feel uncomfortable not drinking in that scenario? Would you stay? I’d like to think I would stay. I do think there would be some times where I’d think…Maybe I should go home. But I think with practice, you could do it. How do you react to people who have chosen to limit their drinking, either indefinitely or for an extended amount of time? Would you be supportive? I’m always supportive, I think the reason for that is…I see…I actually respect what they’re doing, and that one day, I might definitely do the same thing. If you did do a HSM, hypothetically, what kind of goals would you make for yourself? I’d love to do it just to prove to myself I could do it, and in that time, see what kinds of amazing things I could accomplish in the 3 months, or 2 months, or 7 months…(laughs) Is there anything in particular stopping you from not doing that right now? I guess I’m waiting for the right time. I feel like the time is approaching. I guess the obstacle at the moment is just…committing. Yeah, everyone has to do it at their own speed or…you just won’t do it. Lastly, what motivates you? Good times. Fun. And Good vibes. And people feeling good about themselves and the stuff that’s happening around them. Awesome Dude.

A while back now, right before Chris Raine moved away from Melbourne (about a month before I did also) we sat down to say our good-byes. What was meant to be coffee turned into lunch, and we spent the next 6 hours having one of those conversations you generally reserve for people you’ve known longer than the collective 8 hours you’ve spent with them. I was kind of embarrassed after we parted ways. I thought about the things I had told him; about my family, about my friends, about my dreams and aspirations, and the things that scared me in the world. There was a moment of regret, images of ships sinking because of my loose lips. I nicknamed him the human syringe for having the uncanny ability to reach in and steal all my secrets. One thing in particular has stayed with me from this particular conversation, and it’s of the expectations I hold of myself. For example, I don’t have any (Disclaimer: particulary life-destroying) secrets. What was I worried about? Maybe it was because I tend to present a certain version of myself to people I don’t know well. Maybe it’s because I tend to present a certain ‘version’ of myself, period. For example, it came to my attention in the last 12 months that my extended group of friends had a general ‘consensus’ about me. An understanding, if you will. Look, the dictionary definition would be as follows: Mariko: Girl that always smiles, with an insane infectious laugh. Impenetrable against despair and boredom.  Bleeds rainbows and pixie dust. Free time spent looking upwards with a grin from ear to ear, enjoying the feel of abounding freedom. Washes hair in a stream as wood elf sit idly by, playing melodies from their hand-cut pan pipes. Etcetera, Etcetera. Don’t get me wrong- it could be worse.  I could be a nasty bitch from hell that nobody likes (Depends who you are, really).  The description above is far more flattering and seemingly harmless. What freaks me out is that I didn’t like to shift anyone’s expectation of this. After all, it’s such a nice thought. The girl who always smiles tends to make you smile, and if you know you can do this, why would you stop? I placed an imaginary pressure on myself to maintain this after the 100^th analysis on my personality by a third party. Besides, if I stopped, I might be found out as a totally normal human being who has a nasty cranky streak. Like, oh no. In the company of people who should be closest to me, I tried not to have bad days. I withheld bad news. I stepped around serious conversations. I kept this up not for the love of entertaining people (which I do enjoy) but to not shatter their expectations of me- a  stupid choice made by me alone. I made myself untouchable in a way. When I stopped drinking between June-September this year, it made me realise how exhausted I was keeping this up. It also gave me the courage to smash those ‘expectations’ into a fine paste because I was already practicing the art in HSM. How people see me and how I saw me was so far apart I knew I had to close the divide. I’ve made slow and steady progress in the last few months, and I feel more comfortable with the identity I project.

I forgot somewhere that friendships aren’t just based on smiles and good times. Good friends are proverbial husbands and wives, there for better OR worse when bad times blind sight you on a random Tuesday morning. They tell you they don’t care if you’re human dregs/pirate scum. They tell you they believe in you. They care. Maybe that’s why many people find they lose friendships as they persist in their own HSM. Maybe that’s not a bad thing.

I spent my 25th birthday sober.

Yes. Sober. If the first sentence sounded inexplicably morose in your head, (not dissimilar to a doctor giving a patient bad news), we could be related. If the words that followed were steeped in melancholy, well! Pull up a chair and sit by me. We’ll drown our sorrows in a couple of G + T’s. Hold the G. When it comes to words, there is nothing as cruel as the word lisp, or more sobering as the word sober. Except for me.

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-A blog I should have posted 3 weeks ago - I have taken a lover. It’s name is caffeine. Caffeine is the first thing I think of in the morning. It never fails to put a big smile of my face. It sometimes gives me tremors or heart palpitations. Caffeine is taking dancing lessons with me. It always takes me out on dates and loves hanging around my friends. In fact, caffeine makes me want to be a better person.

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I usually measure my level of debauchery from the dance move currently being performed. On a scale of 1-10, 1 being completely sober and 10 being Lindsay Lohan, it follows this loose scale:

1. No dancing. General mingling around the bar area. Comments about the excellent/poor bass magnifying architecture are exchanged.
2. Tap foot on floor, clap hand on thigh. Maintain conversation about work/relationship/drink prices/lack of smoking area.
3. Commence nonchalant head bopping to easy, recognisable beats. Hover awkwardly on the dance floor. Push through mountains of people 15 times to frequent the bar.
4. Relax. Groove to the music. Frequent the bar.
5. Enter ‘The Point” (Read below for detail description)
6. Mimic other peoples hilarious dance moves around you, preferably behind them, thrusting, whilst taking photos of myself. Read the rest of this entry →

I got proper hammered last Friday.

The day before I travelled up to Brisbane to spend a few days with the old ball and chain, otherwise known as the Clyde to my Bonnie (we shall call him Chris from now on). Friday was a casual affair at the local restaurant with Chris’s family and a few mates from uni celebrating the end of Semester. What was meant to be an innocent dinner accidently turned into my last hurrah, the final hangover before my 3 month stint with HSM.

Alcohol works on a bartering system. Apparently, if you take equal quantities of beer (thanks for coming to dinner ya’ll), red wine (Is this a trumpet? I’m pretty sure I can play it!), gin and tonic (Let me tell you, in exact detail, the time I went around Europe), Mojitos (HAHAHA! You don’t say. Wait. What did you say?)Espresso martini’s (Ya knowse guyshes, the brill…the brillyin…the good thing habout thiss sshdrink, ish that ish it DELICIOUS. Ish dat not asmazshing?), tequila (inaudible gurgling noises) and 100,000 cigarettes, you can exchange it for a slideshow of memory stills consisting of blurry faces, dark places, bruised legs, cold cement, the mystery taxi ride home, and the bedroom floor.

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It’s 4.42pm, Monday afternoon, and I’ve spent it restlessly looking for jobs and constantly checking my mobile for missed calls from potential employers. I’m sick with a suspected chest inspection and I’ve had to cancel my Centrelink appointment because my tonsils feel like sandpaper. The woman on the phone was less than helpful (“No, no appointments anywhere in Melbourne, you’ll have to cancel and relodge your claim, NO extensions possible, no no no”) and I can feel myself whirl pooling into a nice, comfy nest of self-pity. So far, like normal working hours, Monday blows.

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