Day 1 23/5
22/05/12 • 2 Comments

23/5/2012. WEll getting started is n\’t going so well. I have done 3 months before and it wasn\’t so hard. Felt good. But need to start this and take it seriously . Falling back into those casual drinks at night, which is not useful as I ened to study most nights of the week. I am not doing this. It\’s called avoidance. So here we go. May have to check in daily for a few weeks until I get that I really mean to do this properly this time. October the 15th is the last day of study so realistically it owuld eb good to carry on this way until that date if not forever.  

day 1 ( yes again) 8/3/2012
07/03/12 • 4 Comments

Need to write a post. Have had a good start to the year.  Feeling more capable, on top of things, despite a heavy workload and the same tricky work environment. So decided a few times to have 1-2 drinks at the end of the  week, This went ok. I did think at the time that I don’t really enjoy it, but did it. Then I had a wobble in myself and realise that thought pattern of thinking of having a drink after a hard day had crept back into my head. An this ahd gone, but obviously not far enough away.   I have to study for my job, a job that I don’t feel that competent at. The study is 25 hours a week, on top of working 4 days a week in a full on area, The study is online and I am feeling feeling very scared today [...]

17/2/2012
17/02/12 • 1 Comment

This si my second x 3 months. Really over the last 6 months, I haven’t spent much time drinking, or having a drink. Even though I have signed up for 3 more months yesterday I decided consciously to have a drink. It was hot, I was feeling like a little relax time before I had work to do at home. Had 2 x g&t’s. Enjoyed them, but didn’t really enjoy the feeling alcohol has on me. I did my work and some exercise . I guess felt like seeing how I wasgoing. handling things ok at this moment, but it was interesting. Most probably should have gone for a swim instead which is what I think i will do 2nite Don’t feel that bad about ti. Will go back not drinking.  Not sure if I want to never drink alcohol again, or just on a social time, that was a [...]

Day 31 14/2/2102
13/02/12 • 0 Comments

Well that’s one month down. The odd urge- more in the sense of that feeling of summer, relaxing with friends, visualising a wine in hand, rather than urge for alcohol. A few times after a crap day, wanting to drown that feeling out, but 2 minutes of self talk or distraction have stopped that. Exercise works the best and  a swim completely wipes that out. Oh how the water heals and soothes. Anyway full first week back at work, no Public holidays making long weekends this week. Tuesday, Slowly , pace myself . Toom much to do. Tonight hope for a swim, make it happen girl.  

Day 27 10/2/2012
10/02/12 • 1 Comment

Friday night, New thing, make sure I do soemthing nice. Tonight free outdoor movie Inception. Beaut night.  Hot , summer, great holiday weather. Unfortunately abck at a job I increasingly realise is not for me. Frustrating, dull and not useful. So , previously I may have drowned my sorrows on A friday. Still feel like a drink or so, but not going there, as likely to gor for more and have to start beginners pilates tomorrow- have a crook back and physio reckons it’s related to my non existent stomach muscles.   Lalalalal, Anyway , funa nd fun and fun eh>> Contemplating job in Nuie, maybe put my hat in…. Anyway HSM is great. Love reading posts . All have a great weekend